What Quilting Means

I make a pretty concerted effort not to get too personal or too squishy here, but today, it's about to get a little personal (not gross) and a little squishy (also not gross).

Whether life seems to just bit continuously, or deals me a one time low blow, it doesn't matter - that's always when I sit there and tell myself, "well, it's time to get to work."  I'm a master of distraction.  I'd rather be busy than sad, and I'd rather be overworked than have time to sit there and dwell on what's getting me down. 

My grandmother (mom's mom) passed away very suddenly last night.  We knew that her health was failing, and we knew from the doctors that she had a limited time left, but last night it was out of left field and it wasn't how any of us saw it ending.  It hurts.  A lot.  Us grandkids were truly blessed to have a grandma like her.  She always made us feel welcome, wanted and loved, even when we were acting out.  She treated all of us equally and made sure none of us felt left out - hell, as little kids she gave us happy unbirthday presents, so while one of us got birthday presents, we got to open a little something too.  She signed every single card for everyone in the family with "Loads of Love."  Little things like that meant a lot to her.  It's been one largely sleepless night and one long day and I miss her so much.  We all do.

Did I mention she had the most beautiful smile?  

So what does that have anything to do with quilting?  I could have done anything tonight.  Anything in the world.  Play some video games, visit friends, read, clean, sleep, cruise...but instead I chose to do something I ordinarily hate.  I grabbed a couple quilts from my stack (more like a disorderly and growing pile, but whatever) of finished projects that need a binding sewn down, went to Mom and Dad's for dinner and I bound quilts.  There is something very calming about that.  Jambalaya, and binding.

But that's what quilting does for me.  It's not just my hobby, it's not just my art, and it's not just my distraction.  It's my therapy.  When everything else is going to absolute shit - when I am angry, anxious or sad - when I am stressed or when I'm lonely or when I'm happy - quilting is what quiets my mind and quiets my heart, and helps me work through whatever ails me.  I get see that progress spelled out in stitches and I will always remember what that particular quilt did for me.

Peace.  That's what quilting means to me.